Here’s a brief humble story about how I learned to create a life full of possibilities I never imagined.
My crusty eyes opened slowly, barely capable of taking in the January daylight in my small Austin apartment.
It had been several days of acute fever, severe pain in my kidney tubules and deep exhaustion. In the stupor of an acute COVID infection, all I’d managed to do for 4 days was feed my cats whose relentless meowing had kept me tethered to life. I was at least grateful for their furry doses of oxytocin.
I’d forgotten that I had Epstein Barr Virus, but at least I hadn’t lived in compulsive worry during the thick of the pandemic.
Just as I was wearily getting out of bed, I was stopped midway in my creaky stretch by the familiar voice who’d accompanied me throughout my strange mystical life.
Now? Really? What a strange time to be hearing the voices.
After all, my stomach was growling and I’d just crawled out from a viral stupor.
The voice instructed me to re-read Paul Brunton’s Short Path to Enlightenment. I’d read it a few years earlier at the suggestion of a therapist, and hadn’t thought about it since. I knew I hadn’t embodied the ideas…
…weird time to be instructing me about enlightenment, don’t you think?
But I did what I always do when I hear the voices… I listened and (sometimes begrudgingly) acted.
I dragged myself to my bookshelf. Found the book. Look at the Table of Contents…
… what do you want me to read?
I heard that I should read the pages about Living as If.
OK. Found it. Here we go.
I hadn’t made it two-thirds of the way down the first page and tears started streaming down my face. My entire body was consumed with Joy. Gratitude. Bliss. Ecstasis. Uncontrollable shaking.
What the F**K is going on?
[Voice]: You are God.
WHAT???? I’m clearly not God.
[Quieter this time, with more compassion]. Oh. But you are.
I sat stunned. Sobbing. Trembling. Laughing. Uncontrollable tears of joy.
And, my open jaw was gaping, speechless with curiosity.
WHAT is happening? What’s going on? Is this what awakening feels like? What does this have to do with me or enlightenment?
[With a gentle nudge] Just be this. It’s not what you thought. This is all there is.
[Then quietly] You ARE God. Let go.
My jaw was still cavernous. I was barely breathing.
I reluctantly let go and felt an immediate release into the pure experience of Living as If I were the pure source of being that we consider God.
I’d read about these experiences, but had only these non-dual experiences before in intervals, usually in meditation or breathwork or ecstatic dance.
This was different. More profound. An unmistakable state of being.
The kundalini-type energetic jolts that are pretty routine in my life became even more intense, and I shook for the better part of 5 hours.
Over and over, I heard You are God. You are it.
Despite my resistance to imagine that possibility, the continuous repetition of the words outside of my own egoic awareness convinced me that something was happening that was well beyond me.
Way beyond my imagination or conception of possibility.
Like Magic, I thought.
Not black magic or voodoo or anything close to the new-age esoteric woo that is so predominant in our culture now.
This is the real deal. A different reality, I thought.
Eventually the intensity of the experience began to subside, and my thoughts returned to the material world. To my body. Breathing. Walking. Eating.
Oh yea. Food. I’m still hungry.
Yet everything was different.
Not only did I feel completely at One with the universe, but AS One.
The rest of that day is a blur, though I recall that I wanted desperately to understand what had happened to me that day January 10, 2022.
Oddly, this profound experience happened a decade (to the day) after my sister ended her life so she could also end her suffering. On that day of my sister’s death, I committed myself to the shortest path possible for another way.
No more torment, I had said in 2012. I have to find a different way.
I believe that we do not have to get stuck in the suffering, hardship and anguish of eternal cycles of hope and despair.
So as I turned to figure out how to bring my Day with God into the material world, I again became an explorer.
I studied awakening experiences. Alchemy. Reality creation. Imagination. Psychedelics. Synchronicity. Magic. Possibility. Creativity. Innovation.
I read esoteric teachings and quantum physics. Channeled books and academic papers. Practical and innovative. Entheogens and embodiment. Grounded and imaginal.
Now, nine months later, with so much magic having erupted in my life in this short time since January 2022, I have come to understand how to create “alternate” realities beyond than those we call “real.”
Beyond the news. Beyond social media. Beyond your stories, or your best friends’ interpretation of your stories. Especially beyond your therapist’s interpretation of your stories.
I’ve come to understand how to:
We are limitless AS Humans.
We live in an ever-expanding awareness of reality. Limitless.
Don’t you think it’s time we begin to live as the God-beings that we truly are?
Infinite and eternal.
It’s who we are.
While this experience happened about nine months ago, I didn’t want to share it until I’d learned how to make use of it. No part of me wants to aggrandize the experience. And, I wanted to see if it would last. And, of course, I wanted to avoid judgment or projections of others. I’m just another human having another experience.
And because I wanted to be practical, to make it useful. What’s the point of a broom if you don’t know how to sweep?
So as a result, I’ve synthesized the traditions, techniques and tools that have been in effect in my own life and among my clients, long before I understood what was happening.
I needed to have a deeper awareness of how to reproduce it in my life before I could share it fully. And seemingly the only way to make that happen was first to be God for a day.
I hope you’ll choose to join me in creating your new human reality. You can live the life you desire, even now. In fact, it’s high time you did.
The world needs you.
I’m the Author of the bestseller, The Golden Thread: Where to Find Purpose in the Stages of Your Life. Download this free audio course to learn about your own Golden Thread of purpose.
I am a purpose activator and catalyst. I warn people they shouldn’t be near me unless they want to become a new version of themselves. That scares some people, delights others.
I’ve spent my life imagining a world where we could all become who we’re meant to be, awake and alive in a way that allows us to express our most innate, natural and purposeful gifts. I’m the creator and dreamer behind the Purpose Flywheel™.
Stay tuned or contact me to get started now.